One of the things I’ve struggled with in curating the Society of Southern Gentlemen blog is how to tie it into the “Manosphere” microcosm. Personally, I read several blogs that I would not link to here, even though I find some of their “red pill” insight valuable. They address many of the issues that a modern Gentleman faces, but they don’t fit within the scope of “Southern Gentlemanliness”. I endeavor to be a careful curator of content that is relevant to Southern culture and gentlemanliness in particular. I respect the time that you’ve taken to read this site and I don’t want to engage in false advertising. If you want to read those other sites, you know where to find them.
You won’t find me posting hookup hints; for one, I don’t want to promote behavior that I would’t want used on my daughters or by my son. While I commend those who are trying to define “neomasculinity”, I haven’t given up on “paleomasculinity” yet.
I would like to take the time to reference a recent post over at The Private Man. The author there categorized the current slate of Manoshere sites into three categories:
1. MRAs – “Mens Rights Activists”. These are the cultural and political soldiers who call attention to the often egregious inequalities in our current legal and social system. If you’re looking for true equality between the sexes, these are the people with whom to align and support. This group also gets the most mainstream media coverage, usually by lazy or ideological-driven “journalists”.
2. MGTOWs – “Men Going Their Own Way” (It’s pronounced “Mig-Tao”) Welcome to the group of men who reject most of the social expectations foisted on the male sex. These are the expectations of self-sacrifice, following the approved life script that insists on cow towing to the feminine imperative, and being cultural cannon fodder for a socio-economic system that views men as completely expendable or simply invisible. MGTOWs ain’t havin’ any of that crap.
3. PUAs – “Pick Up Artists”. Want to learn how women think and act in the context of attraction and seduction? This group of men (and women!) are the part of the Manosphere that has a deep and truthful understanding of the minds of women. Sometimes it’s not pretty to read or watch because PUAs know that women are fundamentally predictable when it comes to the attraction patterns they have for men.
When I look through that list, I don’t see any that I would particularly want to affiliate this site with. Mens Rights Activists (MRAs) for instance. Just using that term and referring to ones self as a an activist is not gentlemanly. A Gentleman is above activism. In my opinion, “activism” reflects poor breeding, and this is just anti-social justice warriorism. Social Justice Warriors, and those who use their tactics against them are no warriors to start with; its is a misappropriation of the term “warrior”. Next, Men Going Their Own Way (MGTOWs), or “we give up and are checking out”. Again, ungentlemanly. At least the MRA crowd is willing to fight. Finally, Pickup Artists (PUAs). I’ve got to say, that when you strip away the hedonism, this is probably where this blog aligns, with the caveat mentioned above. That is why I like The Private Man’s predesignation of this class:
I propose that PUA be retired completely and a new term be used in lieu of that. The core ethos of being a more attractive man is Masculine Self Improvement, or MSI. There is so much that goes into MSI – physical appearance, charisma, social skills, confidence, and more. Also, MSI is NOT just being more attractive to the opposite sex. In fact, just being more attractive to women is the completely wrong approach. Men must look at self-improvement as a, frankly, very selfish approach to life. There’s not a thing wrong with that.
Now that is a notion that I could get onboard with, and that aligns better with the purpose of this blog. No notch count, just a focus on self-improvement. Now I’d throw in there an appreciation of Southern culture, and sweet tea. That would be a segment of the Manosphere I’d be comfortable associating this blog with.
I’d be remiss if I didn’t promote another blog that was some inspiration to the establishment of this site: http://www.artofmanliness.com/. I appreciate the effort that McKays have undertaken there. I’d categorize it as masculine self improvement, and am happy to refer to it by name.